have you...

well... well... well... its been awhile since i last wrote to my blog. been busy sorry.

there are many things happened to me this past weeks.. no.... months and i really appreciate it and happy.

first, Lian finally made her dream come true to be a novice at the abbey. (did i spell it right?) yeah, i was lonely when i first heard it, we've become close to each other since i handled their group. talk together, laughed together, sing together and could you imagine we even went in a cave together (not actually just the two of us. it's our chapter's expedition).

second, we tried to made a novel. ahahahaha...but in the end i was the only one who will finished it... haaayyy... but still i want to finish it for her sake and for my sake too.

third there is a guy who profess to me... nyay! ummm... i'm six years older to that guy.... at first i couldn't believe it so i told him don't expect something in return... so he put a distance between the two of us.

but now everything is fine. we're doing fine as much as the two of us is concerned.

fourth a problem occur, family problem rather. i dont want to talk about it not because i am running away. i dont want to talk about it because it isnt proper for me to blog it here but i guess everything starting to go back to normal.

fifth, a revelation occur to our chapter, our chapter head will i dunno if the word is right "migrate" or something like that to singapore. and we are like children who abandoned by their parents.. but according to them someone will adapt us....aawww... but still we need to continue our work.

sixth, we've been busy in our MTV IN THE MAKING.... its so tiring but it's worth it. we are now in film editing stage and im so excited about it!

so many things happen, have you think that these things would be easy for me without my family, friends and God? i dont think so, with these instances, i learn to depend and hope to God that everything will be alright.

have you think that life's burden will ease up if you lifted it up to God, share it with family and circle of trusted friends? now, why not try it?

Try prayer it works

those are famous lines isnt it? well... it really works in me...

in every thing i've done i alway lift it up to God, i prayed. and hey! it works. i mean i know prayer alone is not enough, you still need to do your part too...

anyway, i've been in a state of confusion. i am confuse how i felt.

you see, there's this boy (yeah boy not a guy) i saw him cute the first thing i've seen him. thats all, but then... a year after, he profess his feelings to me. i was shock of course.

i told him he need to think about things. what if it was only infatuation right? so he think it over.

aarrghh! in short i wasnt aware that i have a crush on him.. hahahahaha...

but oh boy! i still need to pray it over, cause i have so many apprehension. need to think it over before jumping into conclusion.

I lose 2kgs in 5 days...

yeah... you read it right... within five days i lose two (2) kilos. before my weight is 39 kilos and after 5 days now im 37 kilos....

how i do it?? let me tell you what i've done within five days....

day1:saturday... i woke up 2 in the morning to prepare for my first flight to cagayan de oro... the flight was great (for the first timer).... i met my friends at domestic airport...we arrive at cagayan de oro about 6:45 in the morning... from there i met the person whom my officemate contacted for me....

we travel for more or less four (4) hours from Cagayan de Oro airport to Tubod Lanao Del NOrte...

revo lang po yun.... and 14 kami... imagine... four people in front (including 2 drivers)... then vivs and mike.... in the middle are tzi, hann, deng and lino...

now... at the back.... row sa left bec, shevey and lian... sa harap nila kami... si lea, nenz, at ako...

can you imagine that? hahahahahaha... long drive yun... nagkasya kami.... well... tapos may baggage pa... hehehehe... uummm.. may top load naman... hehehehe...

we check inn at DR Inn... then after that we travel to MCC (Mindanao Civic Center) kung saan ang venue ng ILC namin (INternational Leaders COnference) almost lunch time na when we got there...

in short... we spend our time there... i attended the workshop Deal or No Deal knowing Gods Gift.

nung nasa workshop na ako.... tumawag saken si mike sinabi niya napupunta sila sa DR Inn.. so in short naiwan ako... i thought i was the only one left... but after about two hours i saw lian outside... so the two of us loitter... food trip and other stuffs...

yung iba kong mga kasama is nakatulog at nakaligo pa... pero kami ni lian walang panahong matulog pa...

so in the end of the day we are tired.... i remember i fell asleep for session 3: Lamentations... hahahahahaha....

all of us went back at DR Inn about 2 am... and... naligo na ako para bukas ndi na ako makikipag unahang maligo sa kanila... so is lian...

day2: Woke up around 5am... ginising ko din si lian... kasi aayusin na rin namin ang gamit namin... sasama na namin sa MCC dahil diretso na kaming puntang Bukidnon... so hilamos... toothbrush.. palit damit lang ang ginawa namin... dinala na namin yung mga bag namin... ung bag ko na sinasabi nila na mas malaki pa sa akin hehehehehehehe...

hinahabol kasi namin yung mass e... so nung pagdating namin dun... nagalmusal lang kami sponsored by chowking.. hehehehehe then punta na kaming arena... dahil dun ang mass...

to make it short.. the mass has ended and there are some sharers din.. napaiyak pa nga ako sa isang sharer dun e... ndi ko mapigilan yugn iyak ko...

then we hurriedly get our lunch kasi yung bus e aalis ng 11am... well luckily we got there before 11 am but the bus left aroung 12:30... >_<>

we travel for about 4 hours.. then tambay kami sa SM Cagayan de oro kasi wait pa namin ung sasakyan na magdadala samin sa Bukidnon.. Elf siya and pagaari ni tito chris... bayaw ni tita len.

i dunno kung ilang kami at paano kami nagkasya sa elf e.. pero may revo pa din naman... hehehehehe

we stop at foot bath, del monte bukidnon, the view deck there, GK Sites, and we stop para kumain ng dinner... we arrived at valencia around.... 12am... then we need to sleep pa kasi may mag itinerary pa kami tom (aba siyempre di ba kahit papaano beauty rest kami) sa bahay ni kuya (thats what we call it) ang mga kasma ko is puro girls... namely, shevey, lea, rhia, bennie, lian, vivs, bec, hann and nenz.

day3: umalis na si lea kahit na anong pilit naming magpachange ng flight at kahit na gusto niyang sumama saming magcaving ndi pa ren siya nagpapigil.. hhaayyyzzz.... then ginawa namin ang advice ni tita na wag ng maligo dahil after caving ay maliligo din naman kami so nagbitbit na kami ng pampaligo... nagdala sila tita ng breakfast namin and after breakfast hinatid nila si lea sa terminal ng bus.

meanwhile kami ay pumunta kina tito chris... about 11am umalis na kami. fill up kami ng waiver ata yun... courtesy call ba.. hahahahahahaha...

ang layo ng travel namin! as in yung bangin sa baguio?? wala yun! yung mga scenery dun?? walang wala yun!

then... ung mga matataas na lugar/daan dun? wala yun.. may instance na pinabababa kami sa elf kasi ndi kami kaya... yung last e yung 65 degrees ata yun so we have to walk.. we dont have any choice...

we stop by sa isang barangay dun... then from there.. inayos na ng mga guide ang mga hardhat namin nilagyan nila ng flashilight.. then kumain kami ng suman...

i ask kung magkano yung suman... would you believe it only cost 1 peso?!

ng matapos na.. diretso na kami sa cave... we ate lunch near the cave... badtrip lang may naghahanap ba naman ng spoon and fork so nasabi ko tuloy na.. "ay naku! wala ng panahon para maginarte"... and narinig pala siya ni tito hb (herbert) and he laughed at me...

after lunch we prepare ourselves para makapunta sa cave.... lakad pa kami sa mga masusukal an daan at sa kanan mo ay bangin... muntik pa nga akong madulas on the way sa cave pero nakahawak ako sa sangang matinik... kaya ayun.. simula pa lang injured na ako... habang naglalakad ay nagttanggal ng tinik sa daliri...

ng marating na namin ang cave.... they divided the group... each group should have 5 members... but in our group we only have 3... i, lian and bec...group by group we entered the cave....

to make the caving short... lahat na yata ng klaseng lakad nagawa namin... sideways, ordinary lakad, nakayuko, gumapang na parang baby, parang crab at gapang patihaya. ang water dun ay parang nagdeprose ka sa ref... may mababaw at may sobrang lalim na they have to use rope para makatawid lahat.

the higlight of the caving: in order for you to get out of the cave you have to rappel upwards...

while one of the guide tried his best na pigilan ang water to pour down habang may umaakyat... ang mga girls ay nagrappel ng may harness while guys didnt.

masyado na akong naiinip at gusto ko ng umakyat kasi sobrang lamig na... you can see smoke coming out of your body... the heat of your body is going down...

so i decided to rappel without the harness... i was disappointed when they said we need to go some obstacle pa para makalabas... kala ko kasi last na ang rappel e...

kailangan pa naming lumakad pa side ways para makalabas sa napakaliit na butas na yun! the one at your back is bato na and sa harap mo.. super up close and personal about 5 inch ang layo sayo e bato na ren... outside i can hear the others voice... they seemed to be happy... and sa tingin ko yun na ang labas.... so ayun... but then again.... na disappoint ako.. ndi pa pala...

to make it short... nakalabas din kami after ng makipot na daan na un mga 1 hour pa kaming naglakbay... takip silim na ng makalabas kami...

so trekking naman ang ginawa namin... na injure si lian so i have to stay with her kasi ako yung household head niya e.... nasisi ko ang sarili ko kasi ako dapat nasa unahan niya but i leave my position.

9pm na kami nakabalik kina tito rod at tita jovit.... with the help of taong bayan....
hinatid namin yung iba kina tito hb at pinababa kami para mag pray... after ng prayers... napaiyak halos lahat.

we ate our dinner kina tita len.. dun e tinatawanan na lang namin ang mga sarili namin and we cant imagine we survive cave luwao.

day4: we woke up mga 7 na ata tapos naglaba pa kami ng ibang damit kasi puro putik na ang mga damit namin.. pati mga sapatos...

umalis kami ng bandang 10 para mag almusal kina tita len.. dun kinuwento ni tito chris na kaya pala pinapatay ung lights nung nagtetrekking na kami kasi ndi nila alam kung mga npa ba yun... at yung ibang malalalim na tubig dun sa cave may current sa ilalim at kapag naanod ka ay sa ibang cave na ang labas mo... but bumilib siya samen.. dahil kami na daw ang may pinakamabilis na lumabas dun na ganung karami.. 33 kami lahat at halos mga babae pa... walang umiyak... walang nag freak out.... nagtutulung tulungan...

he said that the moral story there... as a leader... kami halos lahat kami ay household head and up... we have to stay alert.. be calm... kasi kami ang nagbibigay ng instructions e... so kapag mali ang instructions mo sa ibang kasama mo... sa susunod sayo (kasi po may info pass mo sa cave e) madidisgrasya siya...

isa lang dapat ang voice na pakikinggan mo (sa rappelling po kasi madaming voice kang maririnig) and that is the voice of GOD... pero ikaw pa ren ang gagawa ng diskarte para maiangat mo sarili mo.

afterwards pumunta kami sa monastery of tranfiguration... ndi kami naligo kasi magsiswimming pa kami e..hehehehehe
yang picture na yan.. yan ang simbahan dun.. nakakatuwa nga e... kasi lumapit samin yung guard and told us na huwag maingay kasi nagdadasal ang mga monk.. so we have to whisper...

sabi tuloy ni tita len "ang sabi e huwag maingay. wag naman kayong magbulungan"

so we took a lots of pictures there here are some of it:

this was mike para lang siyang nagsasun bathing no? hehehehehe... kasi naman talaga namang napaka relaxing ng environment dun... hahanga ka sa mga makikita mong scenery dun.

while this one... isa sa mga nakahandang butas dun sa monastery.. ndi namin alam kung para saan yun.. but mike gave us an idea... so we used it as a props sa picture na ito.. hehehehehe

maganda naman ang kinalabasan... eheheehhe.. para siyang painting.. lam nio yun? yung may man... ndi ko lang alam kung anong title nung painting na yun... it was mike and demboy's version.

then after this trip bumili kami ng konting pasalubong and we went back na sa bahay nila tita len para maglunch...

we went sa gk sites din and here are some pictures:
GK Robinhood kung tawagin nila.. may story yun e... ndi ko lang narinig kung ano yun hehehehehehe..

then we went to lake apo... it was awesome! parang... ewan ko.. kakaiba talaga... and pagbaba pa namin... may ngbenta ng banana que... 3 pesos each! ang mura! grabe!

i took my cellphone off and take some pictures of the well blessed lake apo.
this is lake apo by day... namamangka pa kami jan at 100 lang ang rent sa raft... nung una natatakot ako... kasi ndi ako sanay.. but later... nasanay na ren ako and i enjoy the scenery there...
worth it naman ang paglalagi mo dun sa gitna ng lake apo... maganda sana kung may pagkain ka pa habang nanduduon ka... si shevey nga e gumagawa ng documentary dun... na video ni tito rod at sana mapanood ko ang mga iyon

this one is a silhouette of my sisters in Christ... sabi nila against sa light daw yung pagkuha ko sa cellphone ko... pero natuwa ako sa kinalabasan... hmmm.... kaya wag na ninyo akong hanapin sa picture na yan hehehehehe and there still more..

sunset in lake apo.... in the middle of lake apo yan ha... hehehehehehe and this one another

sunset at lake apo... by the shore... hehehehe wala lang natuwa lang kasi ako... and a bit disappointed... kaya nga gustong gusto ko ng magkaroon ng digicam so i can bring it with me so nagtiyaga lang ako sa cellphone ko.. and hindi naman ako binigo di ba?

after these breath taking scenery... we went swmming! ang entrance... 40 pesos! ahahahahaha.. then by 7:30pm umuwi na kami para magdinner..then sleep na kami

day5: nag mass kami sa monastery... then we went back para mag breakfast sa haws nila tita len and umuwi na kami...

this is the day when we woke up to our dream... a day when we live the paradise called bukidnon... a day when we all back to reality.. back to the big bad world...

so... i dunno know if those things can help you lose weight... but it did work for me.. try it... you wouldnt regret it... ^_~

my once said pain...

a friend of my ex called me... he said its so unfair for my ex....

i just wondering... isnt it he's the one who's being unfair??

i mean... ever since our relationship began.... its been unfair to me...

want to know few?

1. i want to break up with him but he refuse but when he was the one who's breaking up even do i refuse.... does he listen to me?

2. i understand him in everything he do... support him... but does he didnt do the same thing...

3. i fill up his weaknesses... but he didnt

4. he doesnt care, doesnt appreaciate...

5. when bad times occur... hes gone

6. im the only one whos trying to save our relationship

7. im the only one who live in reality

8. more bad times than good times

9. if there's a problem i want to talk it out but he wont give me a chance

10. im the one whos setting our date... im the one whos working things out.

do i have to continue??? things is not like the way they think... i mean... does his friend ever see us? or witness how he behave with me when things go wrong???

i think... the one whos being unfair here is him....

i only said my pain to my ex once... just once and now... he said im being unfair???

ssheeessshhhh..... im not mad... im just... disappointed... i thought hes the one who understand me... but i guess i was wrong....

when will you start?

when will you start notice me?
or even look at me with fondness...
i hope it wont be long
cause i am waiting for so long.

when will you start to care for me?
or love me the way i love you...
i hope it wont be long
cause i am waiting for so long.

when will you start lean on me?
and say that you need me
i hope it wont be long
cause i need you in my life.

when will you start to realize
that i exist in your life
i hope it wont be long
cause i'll left this world soon....

Last Christmas

Have you heard the song "Last Christmas" if im not mistaking WHAM was the one who sang it...

I'm playing Giza a moment ago and suddenly i heard this song (im playing christmas song sa media player) then a line catchd my attention and made me laugh....

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away....

hahahahaha...it remind me about my past... yeah.. the past.... way back then i was sad.. all i can feel was pain but now i laugh at myself why i did that... hahahahaha

and just like the song goes...

This year to save me from tears
I give it to someone special....

yeah, it is true that experience is the best teacher... but i tell you.. you dont have to experience it to learn from it... you can hear it from your friend... and from then you can learn...

there's lot of things happen.. some can made you cry and you wouldnt even know that you made fool of yourself.. but as you remember it.... you will end up laughing to the things you've done and realize how fool you are...

well... enjoy everybody and MERRY CHRISTMAS!

LAST CHRISTMAS

Chorus:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, You gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, You gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
Tell me baby do you recognise me?
Well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

(Happy Christmas!) I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I Love You" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again

Chorus

(Oooh. Oooh Baby)

A crowded room, friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God I thought you were someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man undercover but you tore me apart
Oooh Oooh
Now I've found a real love you'll never fool me again

Chorus

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
(Gave you my heart)
A man undercover but you tore me apart
Next year
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special
special
someone
someone
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special
who'll give me something in return
I'll give it to someone
hold my heart and watch it burn
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special
I've got you here to stay
I can love you for a day
I thought you were someone special
gave you my heart
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone
last christmas I gave you my heart
you gave it away
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone

im back!

yes, after a long time im still alive and kicking! hehehehehehe! its been ages... isnt it?

o well.... i met this guy at the party... he's soft spoken (perhaps its only human nature to be a soft spoken at the first time you met someone)... i like the way he smile... >_< hehehehehehe...

at first.. i didnt noticed him... cause i am busy in that party.... but when i have a chance to take a break and sit beside a friend of mine... i started to notice him. hes alone and i talked to him and asked him if he's alright and havign fun... he said yes he is... and he introduce himself and so do i... i introduced him to my other friends near me.

hahahahaha.. he really is cute... i think i have a crush on him... but beyond that... i dunno... hahahahahaha!

o well.... till here